Gambling is bad, but just remember that lottery tickets won't give you STDs, and slot machines are cheaper than crack cocaine. So, really, gambling isn't all that bad.
Let me demonstrate. Your loving auntesses are wagering on your birth, and at stake is our love for you.
- Stephanie is placing her cards on a January 3rd BOY.
- Alice has you on the line for a January 26th GIRL.
If you are born before January 15th, Stephanie wins. If you are born after January 15th, Alice wins. And whoever loses will bear a grudge against you for at least 8 moons. Unless you birth yourself exactly on January 15th, in which case we will throw you the biggest party ever and probably buy you a pony. Or the less crappy version of a pony (because seriously, who would want a midget horse? those things are ugly and smell like crap), a DRAGON. That's right, a dragon. Don't ask questions
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As for gender, you are clearly going to disappoint one of us, so don't fuck up.xoxo
You do realize that the due date is Valentine's Day, right? Chances are you both will suck with your wager. Just sayin'.
ReplyDelete~Dad
CRAP!! We are way off. Way off.
ReplyDeleteIn my defense, I did not know that the due date is Valentines Day. I'm going to go out on a limb and say Steph didn't either.
OK, we might need a modification blog entry.